How To Write a Facebook Update That Doesn’t Make Your Friends Freak Out

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See that? Don’t do that. If you write an update on everyone’s favorite Blue Social Network from the hospital or a funeral home or the Black Hole of Doom, give a little context.

You see, we love you. The people who care enough to worry about you when you write something scary…we love you, and we really worry when we read things that sound like something awful is happening. And if you do post something like this…well, you’re looking for sympathy, right? Don’t disappear right after. Let us know if you’re there for a hangnail, or a brain tumor, or anything in between.

You get more sympathy. We don’t have heart attacks. Everything becomes better.

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